I’m a nude prude

I don’t want to go to a clothing optional resort with naked dinning; a nudist camp in the wilderness, or play golf in the buff. Why? I don’t want to see your naughty bits while eating my cheesecake for one thing. My bladder leaks when I cough, sneeze, or laugh for another thing. And I’m definitely not shaving my public hair.

Wearing my birthday suit in a crowd is not my idea of body empowerment. I’d rather style and profile in my yoga pants at the senior center. What’s next, nude Bingo?

I’m proud to be a nude prude. Bring on the parade!

Until we chat again, this old bag declares, “Aging is for cheese and wine—not women.”