Tue, 29 Dec 2015 Feature Article

Letter To My Future Wife: The Penis Is The Greatest Breakfast Ever

Letter To My Future Wife: The Penis Is The Greatest Breakfast Ever
29 DEC 2015 LISTEN

Hello my dearest!
Good morning and hope you are doing well? I know this new letter would make your day very well. It is a letter to you, but not you alone, because, I know your friends also read my articles to you. In this my article, it is meant to address some issues pertaining to life and women in general. Staying with you thought me lots of lessons and after careful observing your personality, your phones calls, watsapp messages I have chance on and discussions with your friends , I bring to you my findings from what I have research about you.

You have thought me that; a true friend is like a penis, he stands up for you in times of need. A genuine friend is like a bra, she supports you at all times. A faithful friend is like a condom , he protects you from all harm. A loving friend is like a vagina, she accommodates you fully despite the size of your problem. What kind of a friend are you to me? Penis, condom, bra or vagina friend?

Do u know that the penis is the greatest breakfast ever? According to scientist it has a mushroom head, a sausage body, two eggs and milk which provide nutrients. Thus making ladies healthy and full for 9 months. Besides it has 3 good manners too.

1. It’s very courteous, it stands before it performs

2. It is very emotional, it weeps during performance

3. It is polite, it bows after performing.
My love, let your ladies friend read this and laugh, and also to your male friends to make them happy and be proud of themselves.

⭕1. Kamasutra says : If you suck one nipple, the woman herself offers the other one. And that was the origin of "buy one get one free"!

⭕2. Did you ever notice: everything on a woman's upper body starts with a "B". Blouse, Bra, Bikini, Boobs & lower body with a "P" Peticoat, panties, pussy... That's origin of "BP"!

⭕3. Before sex, you help each other get naked. After sex, you dress only yourself. Moral of the story: In life no one helps you once you're fucked. So, women or ladies reading this, if you think you give your vagina to men to satisfy them to get something from then, you have failed. If a man promises you the whole world when proposing to you and you think he is saying the truth, give your vagina to him to fuck and then after, he will tell, because of some circumstances beyond his control, he cannot do it anymore. Even, he would not pick your call because he knows you gave it to him because of something.

After all, all he wanted is to enter and see or taste what is there and if there is nothing better, he leaves you to your fate! In fact, any woman who more than 5 men, can just call you and ask you out in a day or a week, I say it is because you are very cheap! The way you keep yourself or brand yourself is how men purchase you. If you brand yourself cheap, men will purchase or bargain you cheap!

So, if you think you are a beautiful lady, and men keep on chasing and calling you and you are proud, they will use you and damp you! By the time you realized, you become, a brand new second hand, or they will call you overhauling! And no man needs overhauling lady!

You see; as you close your legs as a woman, close your mouth also. If you tell your friends everything concerning your relationship, one day when there is a problem, they would use it against you. Do you rememba, you told me a close male friend of yours insulted you? This is small Atiwa, the bigger Atiwa is on the way coming. So it is just a warning sign God has revealed it to you! So keep on keep on entertaining him and one day all your issues you discussed with him would be outside and you become a laughing stalk! ATIWA KAKRA!

When you told me this, I laugh PLENTYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY, but sympathized with you. So my dear ladies, please keep your mouth shut small concerning some critical issues concerning your life! Ooh Women! People don’t trust a woman having a male friend as a best friend! NEVA!

⭕4. Success is like pregnancy. Everybody congratulates you but nobody knows how many times you got fucked to achieve it. Any woman who more than 5 men fucked you before married, you are indeed a disgrace to womanhood or society and you need forgiveness from God. Women must close their legs small.

⭕5. Life is like a dick; sometimes it becomes hard for no reason and if a man too, you are unable to control yourself, you become "Wisa"and you finally blame your family witches, foolishness, control your libido as a man!

⭕6. Practical thought: A husband is supposed to make his wife's panties wet, not her eyes. A wife is supposed to make her husband's dick hard, not his life..!

⭕When a lady is pregnant,
all her friends touch her stomach ad say "Congrats!".

But none of them come and touch the man's Penis and say "Well done!".

Moral: Hard work is never appreciated: Only results matter. Why ?

Hope you have enjoyed my article. Share to your friends and hope women have learnt lots of lessons from this piece! ATIWA KAKRA!

Yours Darling!
Gunners 4 life!