The Price of Modern Love

Chapter I: The Silent Price Men Pay
So I speak as Adam, not as an enemy; as a man, not as a pot of confusion; and as a bearer of truth. This is a real story that thousands of young men like myself silently carry with teary hearts in this age and time.

A man without a car is often seen as a man without value. A man without a job is often told he is not ready for love—as if love requires a monthly income. And a man with all the best qualities and even a luxurious duplex is still seen, in the eyes of Eve, as a libidinous man.

This has obliged thousands of young men like myself to ask: Is it the man, or the money that comes with him, that women want in a relationship today? Is it the connection or the comfort—the lifestyle, the promise of being kept? Is love still love when it comes with a price tag? Or has it become a currency—traded, spent, and withdrawn when expectations aren’t met? Has love lost its soul, or have we, the people seeking it, become too expensive for genuine affection to survive?

I say this not in bitterness, but in boldness. Men are judged not by the weight of their hearts, but by the weight of their wallets. We are told to love unconditionally, yet we are loved conditionally—conditional upon our ability to provide, impress, and upgrade a lifestyle we did not create. Modern love has forced men to bleed in silence, not because they lack strength, but because they are made to live only for the satisfaction of women.

In today’s world, a man is not valued for his heart, his loyalty, or his sacrifices; he is valued only for what he can provide. If he has no money, status, or influence, he becomes invisible—even to the very woman he once gave his all to. This is the price men pay: women do not offer sympathy, only demands. A struggling man is not comforted; he is mocked, abandoned, or compared to another who can “do better.” The world does not care about his sleepless nights, his hidden tears, or his broken spirit—it only wants results.

When a man falls, he is left to rise alone—no safety net, no compassion, no mercy. Yesterday’s success means nothing if today he cannot maintain it. One mistake, one downfall, and he becomes irrelevant—even to those who once sang his praises.

Women have built modern love on conditions. They say they want care, affection, and commitment, yet their loyalty is measured by a man’s ability to provide. The moment he cannot, he is discarded like an old tool. No matter how much love he gives, no matter how much of himself he sacrifices, his worth is never tied to who he is, but always to what he can deliver.

This is why men work themselves to death—not for their own peace, but to meet expectations that will never end. Society does not teach men how to handle the pain that comes with this burden. Instead, it tells us to “be a man,” while ignoring the heartbreak, stress, and silent battles we endure because of women’s insatiable demands. If we speak, we are called weak. If we remain silent, we suffer alone. Our problems are dismissed as complaints; our struggles treated as excuses.

In relationships, in families, and even in society, men are replaceable. If we cannot provide, we are forgotten. If we fall, we are mocked. If we love without wealth, our love is ignored. This is the brutal cost of modern love: men giving everything, only to realize that their value is conditional and their sacrifices temporary.

So we learn the hardest truth: no one is coming to save us. A man must build himself, protect himself, and sustain himself. Because in the age of modern love, women demand endlessly while giving little in return—and men must pay the price in silence. Sad!

Chapter II: The Illusion of Forever and the Reality of Short Time

With a heavy heart, I write of the misconception that men accuse us (women) of being the cause of modern relationships’ downfall. Yet, we stand as bearers of a truth that weighs heavily when modern love reveals itself to be nothing more than a glittering illusion.

Today, women are judged by their bodies. Men say they love, but what they often desire is not companionship—it is possession. They speak of forever, yet their actions speak of short time, once they have gotten what they wanted. They call it love, but it is lust in disguise—lust wearing the mask of commitment until the appetite is satisfied.

What do men really want from love today? Do they seek a partner—or just a body to conquer? Do they want a soulmate—or a distraction until the next temptation arrives? Do they desire loyalty—or simply obedience until their wandering eyes find a new target?

Too often, men confuse sex with love. They treat women as a temporary thrill rather than eternal companions. They promise exclusivity but maintain secret affairs. They demand faithfulness but betray it at the smallest opportunity.

Men will go to great lengths to get what they want, using sweet words: “You are enough,” “I am satisfied with you,” “You are my heartstring”—all while scrolling endlessly for more and more...

Modern love has become poisoned by inconsistency. Women give their time, patience, sacrifice, and emotion—yet men reduce it to a game of pursuit and withdrawal. Their cycle is predictable: pursue with passion, conquer with words, withdraw with excuses, and repeat with another. This is so pathetic for us.

The tragedy is not that women cannot love. The tragedy is that men have redefined love as something transactional, conditional, and shallow. This modern arrangement has cost women dignity—when a woman realizes she was only loved for her body, not her being.

Men often preach about women being “expensive,” about women demanding comfort and lifestyle. Yet, what is truly expensive is the price women pay when men fail to be honest. It is costly when women must heal from betrayals that should never have existed. It is costly when women must love men who cannot even define love beyond the bedroom.

We, as women, are not asking for castles or crowns. We are asking for consistency. Not luxury, but loyalty. Not money, but meaning. Not lust, but love. A love that is not conditional on appearance or temporary pleasure, but one that is rooted in respect, fidelity, and sincerity.

If modern love feels broken, it is not because women ask too much—it is because men too often offer too little. They bring promises without practice, desires without discipline, affection without accountability. The price of modern love is heavy, but women are no longer willing to pay it in silence.

For if love is to survive in this generation, men must understand that a woman is not a commodity, not an object, not a trophy. She is a soul, a heart, a life. And any man who cannot honor that truth does not deserve to call his appetite love.

By: Varlayee Duanah Korlleh
Co-Author: Mariama Bafalie

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