Letters to My Mother-Adwoa Eko

Dear Mother,
First Love: Fresh Beginning.
By the faith we share I can confidently say that God had planned for children to bury their parents. What has also become obvious to both of us is that there are exceptions even to the laws of our faith. And so over the years we have seen parents bury their children and most often their only children or their most promising children in such grief and agony.

In the year 2015 Joe Biden, Vice president of the worlds most powerful country, America, where I have promised to take you, buried his son Beau Biden. Since the news of the death of my St. John’s School mate and that of Kwame Boadu broke I have been wondering if any of them was to me what words would I have left for you and Manna.

You knowing me very well, if there is that one thing that I have desired to do prominently then it has been to cement our love with the one thing I know to do a little which I believe I inherited from you both. I have on several occasions tried writing to you. I have only been haunted by my own pain of your inability to read these correspondences. It is the very reason that whenever I visit I tell Mamaa to teach you to read and write when she herself as a pre-schooler is barely learning to do same.

Whiles I hope it will not be the last I also hope to reflect much more on our love than our pains. After all it is only in love that we can take consolation from the pains we endure.

But I hope you felt the poem ‘When I Think of A Woman’ and my open letter for the Chibok girls to be freed? There were all inspired by you. For whenever I think of a woman I think of you mother. And whenever I reflect on the agony of the mothers whose children were abducted I remember your own struggle.

If there is ever a person I have prayed for so much in my life apart from your grandchild Manna then it is you. I have prayed for your revival. I have prayed for your healing and most importantly I have prayed for your salvation. And I have also prayed for your freedom and for our reunion. That day when you, manna, your daughter-in-law and I will spend your last days together. I have also prayed for the day I will fly you all over to see the world for yourself and to see America and for the day I will give you the life I have seen great sons give their mother.

I have not done these prayers in vain and as mere wishes. I have seen miracles. If not that much then our very own miracles. You surviving mysterious ailment and me surviving humanly created deficits.

I have also read about the power of prayer particularly children and the many wonderful happenings to people who prayed fervently and worked towards their prayer.

By prayer mother, I have made a life covenant with God to grant you at least 10 more years. If I have lost count of the years then it is simply because for me every day is just the first day of the 10 years and so I am much more encouraged to pray.

Over the years I have seen your own struggle over mystery and your pains to not been able to see your children through, more especially me like every mother would have wanted.

I have seen how you lost everything you worked so hard for. Today even children who when you laid your first blocks long before their parent even thought of their conception have built mansions.

I have seen you lose friends. Even the very ones you shared boundaries and your kitchen with and the back of which my own childhood friendship developed. I have also seen you lose your family and even your own sisters and their children. But I am happy that as the eldest you gave them the opportunity when you had it. It is the very reason none of them can stand in for you as my mother and the mother-in-law of my wife. Not even when you are dead and gone.

But there are two women I will want you to know greatly. Naa of blessed memory and Auntie Janet my benefactor.

Naa in her agedness will always ask of you and extend her regards even when she knows very well I am on my way to work. There was no single day she saw me without asking of you. There were times I have to change my route just to avoid her. May her soul and that of her son and my friend who became a victim of his own ambition and his family rest in perfect peace. I will continuously pray for the judgement of those whose actions and inactions contributed to their woes.

For Auntie Janet she watered the seed you planted the very moment she decided to sponsor my education. She became my inspiration and my ambition along my own struggle to cope with the harsh reality of growing up without the tenderness and care of a mother like all my friends did.

I will also want you to know that your step son Matthew wishes you well.

I have seen the demise of very healthy mothers and that of very affluent sons with access to all the best medical care in the world. That is why you will always remain my miracle.

I have also seen you lose your own life’s ambition and your church.

But I have no doubt they will all come to your funeral. I have no doubt that our souls are connected. That is why your death scares me deeply. Not because I am afraid of death but because it may cause my own death. Even if not literally.

Fifteen years ago you gave me a shot at life. This was after you have carried me for nine months. You gave me a chance at the most priceless gift to ever be given a son. And I know when you borrowed money from your own sister to support Papa to pay for my admission as the only precondition when another sister failed us it was for me to grow to be a fine gentleman. I know it was not that you wanted me to be rich. I know it was your wish that even if I will be rich I will be rich in knowledge. You wanted me to able to read and grow into a gentleman.

Today I am a gentleman and I am also able to read and write.

Let me not be long since this is my very first just as you will forever be my first love. And I just pray your in-law will not be jealous of our love mother.

Warmest,
Nana, your son and baby last.