All FOR THE MONEY!

'What business do you have calling Quansah?' said Araba; she was fuming and you could see the rage in her eyes.
Mary turned to look at the angry lady: 'exactly what are you talking about Araba?' she looked up from the washing she was doing but did not stop.
'Don't' pretend with me. I said why have you been calling my boyfriend…'
Mary burst out laughing 'your boyfriend? Have you forgotten that the man in question is a married man?' by now a crowd was gathering.
'And so what? That does not give you the right to make moves on my man, I thought we knew our boundaries, apparently you are more of a slut than you…'
'look who is talking, if you care to know Quansah was the one who came to me and he offered to sponsor my next trip to London so why not? '
'He what?'
'Well you didn't expect me to let that opportunity pass did you?'

I know you are wondering what that was all about but just hang in there a second and the mystery will be cleared. Haven't you ever experienced two girls engaging in a doggy fight and only to find out that the man in question is even a married man? Of course there are many situations where the man in question may not be married but all the same not worth fighting over.

The recent incidence of the act of pornography without the knowledge of the female partner seems to be a new craze for a certain category of human male species. But the main puzzle lies with the females involved; why do ladies get involved so easily with men who do not respect them?
'Why not, he gives me everything I need and it is his money I love most anyway.'

Suzy knew that her boyfriend was cheating on her and lied to her all the time but she says 'I know but I can't do anything about it because he is one of the richest young and handsome men and I don't think I will get another man like that'
Exactly what is Suzy saying? That she would have left him if he were not that rich?

It is amazing the outrageous stories you can pick from taxi drivers; outrageous but true. This driver in particular picked a young lady in the early hours of the morning. She looked tired and depressed; the driver ventured to ask why and her story was simple. A guy had just returned from the States and had been harassing her for sometime. Eventually, when she gave in to his demands, it was a disappointing experience.
Taxi driver: but madam why on earth did you give in to his sexual demands if you didn't like him?
Lady: well I suppose I thought I would get some of those dollars but imagine that I had sex with him all night and he gave me fifty thousand cedis to pick a taxi!
Taxi driver: what do you do for a living?
Lady: I am a student; I completed SSCE last year but I am re-sitting some of my papers.
Taxi driver: you're a student?
I must tell you that I was sorry for this young girl but is everything about money now? More than fifty percent of girls are at the mercy of certain category of men because of material possessions that they hope to extract from these seemingly rich men.

Kwasi always complains that he gets harassed by girls all the time and so when I called to remind him of a meeting he almost snapped my head off on the phone:
Kwasi: hello? (picking a call)
Me: hi Kwasi, how are you?
Kwasi: I'm fine, who is this?
Me: hey, chill okay this is Esenam
Kwasi: oh sorry... I thought it was someone else
Me: one of your numerous girls…
Kwasi: you won't believe this but the number of calls I receive from girls has tripled since I bought my new car…'
Me: (I laughed) what did you expect...?'

It is a bit scary to think that the only thing that girls seems to care about is a flashy car, expensive fashionable clothes, expensive camera phone and a trip to papaya! In fact most guys will bet on the fact that you can easily get a girl with just a promise of a Samsung flip phone.

Nana Yaw said to me: the last time I got a girl in my bed, all I had to do was buy units for her phone and promised to buy her a new phone. She fell for it but of course I do not cheat girls because I always give them what I promise…can you believe that after I bought her the phone, she is practically glued to me…I don't even know how to disentangle myself from this one. Sometimes I wish I hadn't bought her the phone, cos then she would have left me faster!

Well, the truth of the matter is that even the men who seem to be enjoying these new generation of women, get tired of being seen as gold mines. You and I should be concerned because we are talking about our daughters, nieces, cousins, future wives, future in-laws and friends. Are you wondering how we can possibly change this unpleasant situation? We first have to find out what went wrong, and why materialism has become the bloodline for survival for our young women.

Let's go back to the family which is the first point of contact for a child; what kind of moral values do we teach our children? How do they know what should be a first priority and what should not? The topic of materialism is irrespective of whether the girl comes from a wealthy background or not. You will be surprised to here that most of these girls come from families where they are well catered for; they have homes to live in, their parents pay their school fees, they have decent clothes to wear and they eat three times a day from the house. I believe that it is about time that parents start emphasising on moral values and teach them about harmful effects of greed.

Sometimes, the 'I belong syndrome' which usually is the strongest instrument of peer pressure, is what pushes most decent girls into having sex with men for money. When I was in my second year in the university, Ewura Ama was my floor mate. She was a very simple girl until she joined an exclusive clique.

To be able to march up to their extravagant style of dressing, she ended up with a rich Lebanese boyfriend who bought her a car and well I don't know how her story ended now that we are all out of school. The point I want to make is that we become victims of peer pressure when we allow inferiority complex to suppress our inner selves.

A person who has gone through self discovery, knows what drives and motivates her, and is not easily negatively influenced by friends or the vain trendy nature of society. If every girl should go on a journey to experience self discovery, confidence and develop a unique moral principle, she would not be exchanging her body for the mere fact of money. Instead, she will find herself in a relationship where there is more mutual respect instead of 'all-for-the-money' kind of relationships we see these days.

Esenam DUMENU is the Editor of the dailyEXPRESS and author of the 'Esenam Writes' column on Page 6 of the paper.
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