Sikaman Palava: What's in a name?

I am still wondering why every Korean is called Kim. The name is pretty short and detached and I don't know whether it has become popular because it is easy to pronounce or because there is something nationally sentimental about it.

One thing I know about Koreans is that they are nationalistic and patriotic, if not jingoistic. In North Korea for instance, the nationals used to think that Kim II Sung was immortal. He was almost worshipped like a god and it was only when he died that they realised he was also flesh and blood like any other Korean.

I don't know what they think of Kim Jong II, the successor to Kim II Sung. It has been rumoured that he is very sick, but he is living up to his legendary notoriety by testing undersea missiles and causing a stir along the stretch of the Korean peninsula.

But I like Koreans in general. They are very friendly! One used to bring us materials for publication many years back and the man had so much faith in Kim II Sung. He actually thought Sung was immortal.

"Are you sure Kim II Sung is the best thing that happened to Korea?" I once asked him.

"Absolutely!" he said, giving the thumbs up. "When is the North and South re-unifying?" "One day."

"Do you look forward to it?" "Why not," he said. "We are one people."
"Do you have a girlfriend in Ghana?"

That was when the man laughed all the way back to his embassy. When it was Christmas, he brought me a bottle of whisky and we chatted a lot more about Korea. It was his wish that one day he would travel freely to the South and back without any fuss.

"Why is every Korean called Kim?"
He laughed and laughed! One day, he paid me a visit and said he was going back to Korea. And when will he be returning? "I will not come back."

"Your Ghana girlfriend will miss you."
"Oh, she won't!" he said and bade us farewell. Do not be surprised when you meet a Malian and he is called Traore. Every Guinean who is not a Camara is not a proper Guinean unless his ther name is Toure.

Fly over from Guinea to Togo and the first person you meet is a Kosivi. The name Eyadema or Gnassingbe is very scarce. It is reserved for the family of the ruling oligarchy. If you don't belong to that family, you can't take any of the two names. You won't be charged treasonable felony, but you'd have to explain why you shouldn't be cited for impersonation.

My younger brother, Edward, used to tell me something funny about the Togo national soccer team. According to him, at a certain stage in the team's elopment, all the players were left-footed and the goaIkeeper was also left-handed. He called it a tragedy.

The situation meant the ball was always in a one-way traffic and that spelled the doom of the team.

Well, when Adebayor came round, I guess the single ytraffic ceased for the first time and Togo qualified to play in the World Cup. I'm still wondering where Edward got that information from and how credible it is.

What I'm sure of, however, is that, Ghanaian star-player, Seth Amexo, once played in Togo and imparted a lot of dribbling skills to the receptive Togolese.

From Togo, fly to Burkina Faso and the first man you'd meet is Ouedrago. He looks like Thomas Sankara! Tall and slim! Those who murdered Thomas Sankara should know that one day, the Burkinabe people will hold them to it. When a Lagosian tells you 'one-day, one-day!" believe him.

Yes, go to Lagos and meet Olusegun or Segun (pronounced Shegun). Remember Segun 'Mathematical' Odegbami? He, together with compatriots like Henry Nwosu and Muda Lawai put Algeria to deep sleep in the grand-finale of the 1980 Afri ca Cup of Nations.

When you travel to Britain, the immigration officer, without looking at your passport will ask you whether you are Osei or Boateng or both. He thinks that every Ghanaian is either Osei or Boateng. Lately, we have Kojovi and Fiifi.

Now what is in a name? When I wanted to name my last-born child Barbara, her mummy looked up the name and it meant foreigner. "My child is not a foreigner!" she protested.

"Is she blessed?"
"Yes, of course!" she said with enthusiasm. "Then Iet's name her Benedicta!"
I have heard that there is something positive or negative in every name and names affect lives. I will be taking a few weeks to investigate into names to find out if truly names affect lives.

Why was John Kennedy for instance assassinated?
Was it because of his name? Stay tuned.

Credit: Merari Alomele (The Spectator: Email: [email protected])