Before you start asking yourselves questions about the topic, don't worry about whether I went undercover again.
In fact, with all that is going on around us today, it doesn't take much to have a feel of the sex for job experience, and trust me it is not a one-sided affair in which the men demand from the women.
Just imagine that you are so excited after your graduation, and have such high expectations of grabbing a good job. Perhaps you had very good grades and your assessment of yourself tells you “I am qualified for this job” at the prestigious bank, or that giant mobile company blah blah blah!!!
After three or four years of tertiary education with all its attendant problems and stress, you deserve more than a pat on the back! So there you go with your certificate hanging proudly in your room; you sit by the desk, and beautifully type away your application letters upon letters with so many addresses to send them to.
As the sentences rolls out unto the screen like the notes of a song, you get more excited as you remember all your little accomplishments that are supposed to make your CV look unique among the thousands. The others in the Internet café oblivious to what is happening inside you can only wonder what the excitement is about. Finally, you are done, get home, make a sign of the cross and lay your head to sleep with big dreams, dreams about getting your first salary and buying that car.
Then the work starts, roaming, sweating and distributing application letters as if you were a mail man; receptionists and secretaries give you that bored look- another one on the prowl for a job. As you turn your back, you do not want to think about the fact that your CV and letter was just dumped on the thousands of other correspondence in the back office. I mean, sister has got to keep up the faith, after all that was what the motivational speaker said.
Its three months and you hear nothing, so you begin ask yourself 'what the heck is wrong with me?' is my head too big or my nose too elongated? And it kind of gets worse when you suddenly bump into one of those take-life-easy-chilling sisters or brothers who were your mates on campus now wearing three piece suits and shaking a 'feeling all cool' in a banking hall or office reception.
“Hi sweet,” and a follow up hug comes with it.
“You looking great!” that will be you saying that while your sweat and her skin feel cool after being in the chilled banking hall or office.
“So do you, my sister” that will be her and you know she is lying because you look stressed out walking under the scorching sun looking for a job.
“You work here?”
“Yes oh! How about you, how is life after school? Where do you work now? ”
“Lucky you” by now you thinking 'how the heck did this dump and unserious girl who had third class get to work in this bank? Didn't we all apply at the same time?'
“I am actually following up an application I dropped earlier.”
“Hmm” she sighs knowingly. “It is quiet difficult to get in here but go see Mr. Amanor, he is the Head of Human Resource…”
Of course you do meet Mr. Amanor and he was actually such a nice man, he heard you out and all that and he took your CV again and then your phone number. Your heart sure was lifted. You passed through your friend's office and gratefully thanked her for the little help she offered you.
That evening Mr. Amanor called you just to see how you are doing and you're kind of tongue tied because you didn't even expect him to remember your telephone number.
Soon enough you loosened up and you chat your heart away.
The following day, Mr. Amanor calls again and says you should come and see him and you eagerly go thinking that you have got yourself a job; well he doesn't tell you anything sensible except how beautiful you are and much he can help you. But you are puzzled because he is actually not saying much about your application. That evening he wants to take you to dinner and discuss your application. Well, you want to tell him off but you need this job.
There you are sitting in his car and as his lips move fluidly in a conversation his fingers start a probing journey up your thighs…PAUSE!
Here, there are three scenarios for the sister:
Ignore the probing fingers and let dear Mr. Amanor have his way or you may?
Pull away gently telling him, you're not in the best of moods?
Give him a sound slap on the hands and get the heck out that car as fast as you can?
I don't know, but maybe you decide to choose the second option; and thereafter pull away gently hoping that you do not offend the man, to the extent that you lose the opportunity to get a job.
Well I will tell you what someone else did. She did the above and lost the opportunity to work in that bank.
Now, this is not an imaginary write-up but a real incident. There are many guys struggling to get a job who say that it is easy for ladies to get jobs, I want to say that is not true.
Perhaps the only truth in it lies with a chat I had with another lady. This sister had gone through all the frustrations of submitting applications and job interviews until she met this Managing Director.
“Esenam, things were tough, and it was either I did it or I don't and it was a bit easier because he is good looking and I liked him and better still I did get the job after just a night out… don't look at me so intensely, isn't it better than sleeping around with those useless boys…”
“I'm not listening because I want to condemn you, it's just interesting and giving me another idea to write about in my column.” I said.
For this sister, having sex with the main boss himself in order to get the job was cool, and leaves her in no worry psychologically or emotionally. Job on the right, sex on the left and we will exchange hands?
Now, imagine this. A respectable, prim and proper man, sitting in his office and looking over a stack of documents on the desk. We are talking about a man who has vowed to resist all temptations; even the fair skinned-big-bottomed secretary with the size- D bra. In fact he virtually boasts of his self-control despite the shapeless hag of a woman she calls a wife who wouldn't give him sex sometimes for a whole month.
There he sits at his desk and she walks in, wearing a skirt suit that is begging to be pulled down to cover those thighs and the breast is about spruce out of its cubs. When he looked up, surely he knew he's already in trouble, big time trouble! For the first time in his life, he has met the seductive job seeker. The poor man's knees were already wobbling when she started to talk and by the time he knew it, he had signed her appointment letter without so much as looking at her CV. In fact did she even bring her CV?
I personally know ladies who get a kick out of this kind of thing: reducing powerful men to their knees. But it's not always funny and doesn't apply to everyone. An influential male friend told me a story one day.
“Thinking I was doing this girl some good by introducing her to an MD of a powerful financial house; do you know that this girl went seducing my friend?”
“How do you know” I asked
“He called me and told me in no uncertain terms that I should advice the lady that he was not that type of man. Oh, I had never felt that embarrassed in my life.”
“But how do you know that the man was telling the truth…I mean what if it is actually the other way round?”
“I spoke with the girl and she confirmed it, explaining that she really didn't want to lose this one as well.”
There are so many instances and gory details I can give and perhaps you may have some experiences as well but the morale of these real situations is simple: As a society, do we have to start worrying about how these kinds of activities will affect the younger ones? I mean, girls can decide to mess about in school and end up seducing men for jobs or men can decide to keep harassing young ladies as easiest means of womanizing. What will happen if this trend decides to escalate? What do we do?
By Esenam Dumenu, dailyEXPRESS Newspaper.