To heal before the hurt comes, to cure the pain before the fall comes. Had to learn to shed tears before the cry comes, a life where you see the after before the before comes.
The need to be hard on myself,
It hurt but I can’t cry my sad eyes to sleep.
I care more about my dirty yellow pillow with no pillowcase.
Bottled up the pain,
I can’t let them see the hurt in my heart and the sadness in my eyes or the dirt in my bare claws. Keeping my shoulders up and my chin high, they can’t know how weary I am from all the fixing I have to be doing.
And when I sleep,
I wake before I sleep.
Because of the wolves, the damn wolves. Especially the ones in sheep’s clothing.
Don’t be sad for me,
We all have battles we need to fight. Even the ones we decide to ignore. Especially the ones we decide to ignore.
Just know this,
Everything can happen to us; beauty and terror.
We just keep moving, a step at a time, turn after turn.
Because until eternity calls, this feeling is not final.
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