The Space Between Us
There’s a kind of love that doesn’t need words.
It lives in the quiet moments, cuddles on the couch, shared laughter in the kitchen, hanging out in the colds and on the streets , the way her head rested on my shoulder like it belonged there. We kissed, we touched, we explored each other’s warmth without crossing the final line. Not because we couldn’t, but because we respected each other’s boundaries, because our integrity and dignity were at stake and above all, respecting God’s command that says keep your body as a temple for Christ.
That respect was sacred. It made everything feel real, the care was genuine it felt like a fragrance each passing moment.
She was more than a housemate. She was my comfort, my softness in a world that often felt hard, in a dessert that felt empty and lonely. We massaged away each other’s stress, held each other like the world outside didn’t matter. I loved her not just physically, but emotionally, spiritually. I loved her in the way you love someone you believe might be part of your future.
And then she left.
Not just the house, but the space we shared. A message came: she had a boyfriend now, she met her Prince Charming. Just like that, the air shifted. My heart didn’t break in one loud crack, it folded in on itself, quietly, sobering mood.
She chose looks over loyalty, she chose wisdom over loyalty, she chose younger age than dignity. My world just crushed.
I wanted to scream, but I didn’t. I wanted to ask why, but I didn’t. I wanted to hate her, but I couldn’t.
Instead, I chose grace.
I decided to honor her choice, even if it wasn’t me. I chose to protect myself not out of bitterness, but out of love for my own peace. I still respect her. I still care. But I can’t keep kissing someone who’s kissed someone else in her heart. I can’t keep touching someone who’s already been touched by another promise.
So I’m stepping back.
Not with anger. Not with drama. Just with quiet strength. I won’t announce my withdrawal. I’ll simply shift. I’ll invest in my studies, my faith, my future. I’ll let my silence speak the boundaries my heart needs. I’ll still be kind. I’ll still be present. But I won’t be her comfort anymore.
Because I deserve to be chosen.
Fully. Freely. Without hesitation.
And until that love finds me, I’ll keep walking with dignity. I’ll keep loving myself the way I once loved her, I will keep my head high even in the pool of tears, I will hold myself esteem and never lets my guts down.
Love is wicked, love is heartless, love is crazy. Until I find her, the world is mine to beat. There comes the space between us.