The vampires of Ghana

Do you know what a vampire is? I'm sure you do but I'll tell you anyway. A vampire is a blood sucking person who comes out only in the dark. If you have seen any vampire movies, you will know what I'm talking about. What is all this leading to, I hear you say? Well, I think someone out there thinks Ghanaians are a bunch of vampires. O yes. It's true. Why else would they give us free phone calls between 12.30 a.m and 6 a.m? Because unless you are a vampire, I don't really see what you are doing up at that time of night (unless you work the nightshift of course).

For about a month now, we have not had water flowing in my area. Actually, that's a lie. We have had water, but guess what? It only flows between 2 a.m and 4 a.m.! I guess the water people have also realized Ghanaians are vampires.

I tell you between free night phone calls and fetching water, I wonder when we are supposed to sleep? As for the free night calls, I have never utilized that service. In fact, I've had to resort to turning my phone off at night because of this free night calls business. You see, for some reason, people I have never met, manage to get my number and decide to call me at that 'vampirish' hour.

Now, unless you are my sweetheart who is whispering sweet nothings into my ears, I don't understand why anybody should be calling me at that time in the morning. It's crazy. So for as long as they keep promoting free night calls for these insane hours, my phone will always be off!

But now I've figured out how not to be disturbed by free night calls, something else is interrupting my sleep.

The water situation. I tell you, setting your alarm clock for 2 a.m so you can go fetch buckets of water is no joke. By the time you get back to bed, you are so frustrated and tired.

But what can you do? If you don't fetch water at that time, you will not have water the next day. I just don't understand why they can't give us water at a decent hour so we can all fetch and once we go to bed, we sleep peacefully till the next morning. I just don't get it.
Is it any wonder when you go to someone's office half the employees are sleeping? They've been up all night either making / receiving free night calls or fetching buckets of water. Is it any wonder those in the customer service industry are so snappy sometimes? Yep, lack of sleep.

Have you noticed how early morning meetings tend to go? Most people are sleepy but try very hard to hide their yawns. In fact, even as I'm writing this piece, I have to stop and lie down occasionally. I am so tired, it's unbelievable. Do you know what lack of sleep can do to a human?

For the last couple of days, it's not just the water situation that has kept me up though. The light problems seem to have resurrected. Although it appears we now have regular light, for about three occasions last week, we had our lights turned off, just like that. Guess when they were put back on? Yep, during the vampirish hours.

Eh, so are we supposed to do everything between midnight and dawn? In that case, why don't we change the whole nations living pattern? Why don't we rather make our regular and official working hours midnight to 6 am and then make 6 a.m till midnight the time to relax?

These days, I wake up a very angry woman because I'm not getting a proper full night's sleep. And come mid morning, I'm ready to hit the sack again. Seriously, I constantly feel Pre-Menstrual, especially on the days when for some reason, everybody sleeps through the water providing hours, so come morning, there is no water to brush our teeth, let alone bath.

Worse, is the stench in the bathroom after a number of people have used it throughout the night but have not had water with which to flash.(I must apologize to my male readers who have never had to feel Pre-Menstrual. However, those of you with partners may have some inkling some I'm talking about).

I mean, what kind of life is this? If we spend all night making night calls because we can't afford to use our phone for too long during the day, if we are waking up to nasty toilets, no water, no light, how the hell are we supposed to be happy and productive for the rest of the day? Somebody please tell me.

If we can have water supply at 2a.m surely we can have water supply at a decent hour? If the phone networks can give us free night calls between 12.30a.m and 6a.m what is stopping them from giving us free night calls say between 6p.m and 10p.m and all day weekends? I'll tell you. They don't give a damn about their consumers. Because they know at that vampirish hour, fewer people will utilize that service.

Besides, it's not completely a free service as you have to have a certain amount of credits in your phone in order to make free calls.

Ummm… I mean, if the networks insist on turning us into vampires they should, at the very least, give us total freeness?

Why must we have calling credit if we are not being charged for the call? Why can't we just pick up our phone, credit or not credit and just call? Have you seen the advert which shows a number of people setting their alarms for 12.30a.m just so they can wake up to use the phone?

Every time that advert comes on, I have to change channels. I find it so insulting. Rather than turning us into a nation of vampires who will be unproductive during the day, it would be more useful if the phone networks gave us a proper, decent and affordable service during the day. Come on. You already make so much money from us. Stop taking us for fools, otherwise, one day; I will encourage the whole country for just a day, not to buy any credit for their phones.

I tell you, if Ghanaians were not so passive, these people would not be getting away with this shoddy service and disrespect to their customers.

It's too bad that we can't all agree on a particular day when nobody buys credit. Believe me, the networks will feel it because they rake in hundreds (if not thousands) of dollars daily.

Keeping us awake all night is a very serious situation that we should not take lightly. For example a long distance driver who has been up all night fetching water or making free night calls is more likely to cause an accident than someone who has rested well over night. A student who has been up all night talking on the phone or searching for water is unlikely to perform as well as a well rested student.

Regular lack of sleep affects all of us negatively. Just ask any Psychiatrist. I for one am tired of waking up tired and being tired throughout the day due to lack of sleep I wouldn't even mind if my lack of sleep was due to heavy partying or something that I was causing myself. But I'm tired because some service providers think I'm a vampire. This simply ain't right. Think about it.
But hey, these are just the reflections of an ordinary Ghanaian woman.

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