The Phobia In Phoebe (Part II)

From time immemorial humans had wined and dined with fear though the meal was seasoned with bile instead of salt and the tea vinegar in place of sugar yet mankind relished otherwise he would have gone extinct. In the Garden of Eden Adam and Eve were afraid of God because they were naked. Fear is a stimulus and therefore humans react or respond appropriately or inappropriately as the case may be. Fear sometimes trigger fight or flight response.

I remember a schoolmate in my elementary school who was challenged to a fight by a small boy; he chose to run away, that was a flight response! When a lioness is after a zebra, she says in her heart, “Please wait, don't let me starve!” The zebra on the other hand says, “Please stop don't let me die!” Who dies; who lives?

When I see a live lioness
I 'see' many dead zebras – and their blood which flowed like rivers!

Phoebe (the phobic in my last story) was able to subdue her clinical condition because her therapist understood her malady and helped her deal efficiently, effectively with it. Her therapist mapped out a strategy for her which she carried through. She confronted her problem headlong.

She watched videos of snakes, had the pictures of snakes all around her and did an exclusive research (intellectualization, an ego defense mechanism) on snakes. In fact, she became an island surrounded not by water but snakes. In the end Mr. Phobia, the fugitive took its luggage, jumped out of her mind and absconded.

Fear is part of life and if we continue to run away from it, it will continue to run after us like our shadows that we can't outsmart. But if we confront it, it will turn and scamper away.

What's that thing that gives you goose pimples or floods your system with adrenaline?

Fear of failure or success?
Fear of love because of heart break?
Fear of accident or permanent disability?
Fear of diseases?
Fear of aging?
Fear of becoming overweight or obese?
Fear of infidelity?
Fear of the unknown?
Fear of taking risk?
Fear of criminals?
Fear of hell?
Fear of death?
Fear of fading to obscurity? (for celebrities, socialites and fashionistas)

Fear of poverty or wealth?
Many ladies often say they won't marry very handsome partners for fear of losing them to other women. Yet they want their husbands to be rich but ironically women gravitate much more around rich than handsome men. Some men entertain this belief as well. Remember that what we fear have a way of coming to pass.

People fear to fail conversely they're afraid of success. In fact, so many people have sacrificed their noble dreams on the altar of fear. If you choose to be an average person by being a permanent resident at the pedestal of the socio-economic pyramid, you'll mingle with many people because that's actually where so many people domicile.

If you choose to climb some steps up the pyramid you're likely to lose some friends connected to you by blood, covenant or social bond. They begin to see you as ridiculous, ludicrous.

If you aspire to reach the peak of that pyramid in your society, so many forces would try to pull you down. Even your best friend may push you down from the topmost to the lowest rung of the social ladder. In other words, he'd convert you to a mere acquaintance.

Your family members may directly or indirectly pull you down as well. As a matter of fact, so many animate and inanimate forces would try to cut your wings. You'll also contend with the spiritual gravitational force in an invisible contest.

If however, you choose to reach the peak of the global socio-economic pyramid then be ready to fight your way through. Little wonder Thomas Edison says, “Genius is one percent inspiration and ninety-nine percent perspiration.”

Don't be surprised if you get a hiss when you expect a 'hi,' or back-stabbing instead of backslapping, discouragement in lieu of encouragement, jeering in place of cheering and the like. Do you blame them? You intimidate them and they're trying to be defensive to protect themselves from your 'offensive' personality. You might do exactly like them even worse if you were in their shoes.

Humans criticize others for what they would ideally do in similar circumstances. The ironic but very refreshing thing is that when you eventually get there (mind you success is a journey, never a destination) many of those who dissociated from you will begin to associate with you. They love and want to share in your unusual success story. They no longer see you as unreasonable, overambitious.

Many people however abandoned their noble dreams to keep their friends, relatives and family. How bad! Flimsy people, excuses … don't change world changers because they see beyond walls, 'wars!'

If your parents never went to school, or your father was a fisherman near Victoria Island and your classmates parents' own vast islands, don't feel inferior. You're on scholarship because you're exceptionally brilliant. Is it the colour of your skin that makes you feel inferior? Humans are superior to animals, plants but not another human.

Fuel your passion with courage; confront your fears this brand new week, 'Klitschko' them and 'bolt' the tape reserved for champions. Have a wonderful week!