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This article was first published by the Daily Graphic in March 27, 2009

Our Chief Psychiatrist, Dr Akwasi Osei recently confirmed what I had suspected all along: Most of us, (about some 40 per cent of the population) are either psychologically unbalanced, psychiatrically challenged or gone completely bananas and plantain pieces.

Looking around, it seems that in varying degrees nearly the entire population is truly gone cuckoo, loony, brainsick, demented, disordered, dotty, badly cracked, maniacal, moonstruck and tuned off from sanity.

Someone berated Dr. Osei on the Internet over his claim, describing it as evidence of a typical lack of diligence and excellence among many professions in Ghana today.

Dr Osei's cyberspace assailant demanded evidence that any epidemiological research had been conducted to arrive at an incredible 40 per cent prevalence of mental illness among Ghanaians.

He suggested that the Chief Psychiatrist confined his professional practice to prescribing “abodam” pills for his psychiatric patients.

I think the good doctor really had his mathematics upside down, but only because his statistics were too far out on the conservative side. My own estimate is that some 85 per cent of us have blown fuses in our skulls.

Most of us appear flaky, badly scrambled, screwy, batty, unhinged, daffy, wacky, buggy, touched, unsound and gone full cycle around the bend.

By simply assuming the name of a psycho, one of the most famous musicians in town has conceded the pathology as it applies to him leaving it to the rest of us to acknowledge or deny that we are each creaky upstairs like him.

The evidence is there all around: If you mentally demarcate an area of some 100 meters square within the open spaces, you will find that nearly everyone is busy breaking the law or misbehaving in some dangerous and annoying way.

Except for a relatively small number of desk-bound white collar workers, the majority of people are always out on the roads and that is where evidence of the epidemic of madness is visible.

When there is a dispute over the accuracy or scientific basis for statistics, we could always run to a discipline called “the statistics of statistics” for ready help:

During the week, those who keep the records revealed that an average of 42 people are killed on one of the country's most blood-thirsty highways, the Cape Coast-Accra Highway, every week. That is six people every blessed day!

If we held at least one person responsible for every human life taken, (which methinks we should), then it means more than 40 out of every 100 people are busy killing people in some locations.

On a per centum basis, that works up to more than 40 per cent of the population engaged in murder everyday. Who else but schizophrenics and psychopaths would do that? Quot Erat Demonstrandum, Jomo! Dr Osei is right.

Many blame the abodam epidemic on booze, drugs and Satan's genes in many people. The prudent thing if you ask me, is to accept it, study it, research it and begin a mass therapy!

Gory scenes from the terrible road accidents which have killed hundreds of people in the past few weeks have seen us at our very best at problem solution: It usually takes the form of wringing our hands in despair while looking desperately around for scapegoats to ease our consciences.

But for a colony of lunatics where else will you find human beings being slaughtered like flies and all people ever do, is wring their hands in despair and go looking for solutions everywhere except where they should be looking: Law enforcement.
Examples: Even nursery school children know that roads are for driving on, so how come that we have car and bus parks right in the middle of busy streets?

The very grave danger notwithstanding, motorists have turned two-lane roads into four and five-lane roads.
Trotro bus drivers go charging along the shoulders of the roads throwing up a lot of dust over other road users. Whenever for some miraculous reason they drive on the roads, they stop and take off so dangerously that it is a wonder many road users are lucky to get home in one piece every day.

Keeping your automobile in good condition driving carefully and observing all traffic rules does not guarantee anyone protection from sudden death these days. If all this is not mass madness then get me another dictionary. Continued    Source: DAILY GRAPHIC - Daily Graphic

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