Does Love Cost A Thing?

The Love saga has been misinterpreted, misconceived and miscommunicated to some of us and by most of us. So we go into a relationship with high expectation and a low preparation and if the unexpected happens we lift up our hands and curse the day we were born or vow never to go into the love escapade again.

Many years ago, myself and some folks I called friends hitherto, watched a movie entitled ‘love don’t cost a thing’ and after the movie, we started parading the street of Accra, Lapas, Kokomlemle, Kotobabi and preferably Ofankor looking for a lady to love unconditionally.

In our minds, we have been programmed to accept the notion ‘love don’t cost a thing’ so we are just looking for someone to love and be loved back reciprocally with no checks and balances. This is what most us do, we follow movies and fall love and when we are kicked out the same way we came in nature becomes our number one foe, it is either we hate the opposite sex or distaste our very gender.

I teased the mind of a young Christian lady’s mind by asking her between Alinko Dangote’s son( whom she has never met and will never know) and that particular brother ( whom she knows very well) at the corner there in the church room who will she chose? I did not end my assertion when the young tongue talking, blood washed and holy ghost filled lady rebutted quickly that she won’t hesitate to choose Alinko’s son over the young man at the corner there because the Alinko’s son may understand her better.

And I said how? She replied I like comfortability and want to be treated like an empress( when I heard that I felt a cold shower poured on me and I felt my blood stifling, because I love this lady too but the conditions attached was way beyond my expectations). But I swallowed my intentions to propose and kept my ego to stay single until God send me someone spiritual and who understands that boys aren’t going to be broke forever.

Now, Let’s move on and see if it does cost a thing to love and be loved. The bible said in John 3:16 that and God so Love the world and He GAVE……… If God gave then we can’t do otherwise. The truth is that you can give without loving but you can’t love without giving. Love cost than any material thing you can think of. It was love that drove the hand of the omnipotent God to give out His last and only begotten son.

It wasn’t money, so that means our ladies who think money is the only commodity of exchange in the love market must wake up from their world of fairy- tale. Love could cost money ( Eccl 10:19B), it could cost time, attention, calling, care, concern and other intangible currencies. If neither of these is viable in the relationship then we are going to have a third world war in the relationship.

Young guys, be warned, if a lady tells you: I love you just as you are, it simply means you have less than 12 months to upgrade your standard less you will be fired, and when she tells you money is not my thing, it simply means work harder because the competition is getting tough. In the nutshell, no matter what, don’t be comfortable in the relationship because of Love. Jesus came to die to save us and redeem us (that was love) but He didn’t remain in the grave, He rose on the third day and ascended unto heaven and seated at the right hand of the father. A young man in love, no matter your status, please let’s try and ascend and work things out to keep the ladies we love. The term Love don’t cost a thing is true, but only in the movies, in real life it is untrue.

Boys go like ‘time and ability plus double capacity has fuelled up my ‘lovematic’ tenacity to send you this missive of my deep love for you’ and three months after the same time and ability is now classified as a bad omen, what happened? I leave that for posterity to answer. I am not ignoring the fact that there are some stiff- necked ladies who no matter what won’t appreciate what you do, am only telling my guys to be sharp and swift( matter dey come).

There are some guys too no matter what a lady does, they will never appreciate. They are in a committed relationship yet have a sinful attachment call ‘side chick’ ( Jesus is watching you). And to my ladies please get this straight: Jesus didn’t die for you to become a side chick, you are supposed to be the boss chick or you check out

Young Ladies, you too appreciate the little we do, not all guys are born with Silver spoon in their mouth. Funny enough, broke guys have ego too, you don’t expect a guy to keep mute over an incidence he dislikes just because he is broke. If he is broke and still manage to give you time, attention and care( I can feel a lady saying does time and attention pays the bill? ), what else do you want( a friend is saying in Akan enu na y3 b3 di ada?) It may not have monetary equivalence but that is the cost he can pay for now.

Is the focus not marriage? If your man dislikes the lift that another guy is offering you in the name of business, just stop it and focus on how to get things done to ease your transportation issues. Per my understanding of this current breed of women and mushrooming young men, am tempted to accept the fact that Romance Without Finance is Nuisance, but please permit me to borrow Dr. Mensah Otabil’s words;’’ if you see a young man sleeping on a veranda but trying to write courses and working his way through life, if such a man proposes to you and you ignore him because of his porous beginning, please after 5 years, don’t come crying to me and my Pastors, we cannot help you’’. Thank you

R. Duafah
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