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27.07.2019 Feature Article

Dear Shirley, Please, Double the Damages!

Foreign Affairs Minister, Ms. Shirley Ayorkor Botchwey
LISTEN JUL 27, 2019
Foreign Affairs Minister, Ms. Shirley Ayorkor Botchwey

The Modern Ghana Staff Writer made absolutely no attempt to give readers a detailed background of the news story, which was delectably captioned “Ayorkor Botchwey Sues Larry Dogbe, The Herald Newspaper” (7/16/19). It really did not matter, as far as yours truly was concerned. What mattered more than anything else was the bold and comely decision taken by the Foreign Affairs Minister, Ms. Shirley Ayorkor Botchwey, to teach some of these hotheaded Trokosi Nationalist Political Scam-Artists falsely parading as professional journalists that they had better watch their steps and think twice, no, ten-thousand times, before they decided to pick on their targets for abuse and defamation.

The last time around, they had Nana Addo Dankwa Akufo-Addo in the crosshairs of their character-assassination gauge. I am, of course, talking about the airplane-renting and the UEFA championship tournament between Tottenham Hotspur FC and Liverpool FC, or some such premier UK soccer clubs. On that occasion, the question had to do with whether in spite of all the myriad problems plaguing the country, that President Akufo-Addo had a right to spice up his very hectic schedule with a recreational event or activity or two. Either these SOBs just parachuted onto the Motherland from outer-space or they were simply too daft to get in on the fact that the Little Giant from Akyem-Abomosu was unarguably the most indefatigable of all Ghana’s Fourth-Republican Presidents – bar absolutely none!

Nana Akufo-Addo has also, within the short temporal span of just under three years, brought more substantive businesses into the land in the past 30 years than any other postcolonial Ghanaian president. Indeed, to hear former President John Agyekum-Kufuor tell it, it was the Kyebi Boy who introduced the very first cellphone company into the country. And so, you see, this bona fide denizen of the Galamsey Capital of Ghana and the World, at large – my profound apologies to former President John Dramani Mahama – is a veritable entrepreneurial giant and a pioneer with scarcely any compare.

On the much-maligned trip on the chartered German-made plane, Nana Akufo-Addo initialed far more lucrative contractual agreements, on that one trip alone, than the man who made Ghana the prime destination of recently released terror suspects from Cuba’s US-operated Guantanamo Bay Maximum-Security Prison did in four-and-half years. And the man who has yet to account for the cloudy circumstances precipitating the at once scandalous and mysterious death of his immediate predecessor, has also yet to fully account for the cost of the couple of aircraft that his former Presidential Main-Tire sent him to purchase from Brazil. Indeed, legend has it that at the time of the mysterious passing of President John Evans Atta-Mills, the former crackerjack Legon tax-law professor, the Bole street toughie was under full-scale investigations for brazenly and scandalously doing a Woyome.

Don’t you worry, Dear Reader, Karma will catch up with the Ganger Boy one of these days. To be certain, Mr. Boot-for-Boot is already catching hell on the hustings, where he has been stuck babbling nonsensically about how he intends to better all the projects and policy initiatives implemented by the Prince of Galamseyland which, by the way, the Ganger Boy never even once dreamed about during the 8 protracted years that he was comfortably holed up in the Jubilee-Flagstaff House with his former boss, the same person whose mysterious demise he has yet to explain to the good and longsuffering citizens of New Gold Coast. Under his kleptocratic watch, the Ganger Boy took all the gold from the “Coast” and left the rest of us Wretched of the Earth stranded, barefooted, on the fecal-flooded shore. That was, in fact, how we came by the present “Christian-Name” of Oguaa, to wit, Cape Coast.

Anyway, in the lawsuit hanging over the noggins and pates and the necks of the Trokosi Nationalist Bunch of Ho-Hum Hoodlums, we are informed that the gari-grating “Dog-Bees” concocted a story that had my good, old Auntie Shirley, the Ganyobi, playing the roles of Chief Justice, Attorney-General and IGP, combined, by causing the release of a criminal convict from jail. I thought the Montie Trio’s Episode and our Ganger Boy Scofflaw’s executive depravity were long gone and well behind us. I just can’t wait to see Auntie Shirley shout with joy, pump up her fists and sprint like Usain Bolt, or even Alice Anum, for those of us old enough to remember, all the way to the bank. Hip, hip, hip…hurray!

*Visit my blog at: Ghanaffairs

By Kwame Okoampa-Ahoofe, Jr., PhD

English Department, SUNY-Nassau

Garden City, New York

July 16, 2019

E-mail: [email protected]

Kwame Okoampa-Ahoofe, Jr., Ph.D.
Kwame Okoampa-Ahoofe, Jr., Ph.D., © 2019

The author has 5444 publications published on Modern Ghana.Column: KwameOkoampaAhoofeJr

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