The Great Pito Musician For 2020 Poll!

“The tracks of the elephant cancel those of the antelope” – African Proverb.

It was only a matter of when he would make the announcement, and not if he would make it. All his speeches and actions pointed to the fact that the announcement would be in the affirmative. Even a political neophyte could tell that the so-called “Unity Walk” is a well-orchestrated strategy to project him above other flagbearership contenders of his party.

Well, the obese cat is finally out of the bag and we now know that he is contesting the flagbearership position of his party. He has now confirmed to all and sundry that he is putting his best foot forward for the internal contest.

Did I hear you ask whom I refer to? Don't be confused, the man I refer to is no other than the one who supervised the great looting of the country's resources. Some refer to him as President Ogwanfunu, while others know him as the Great Pito Musician.

To refresh your memory, pito music is sung by people who drink pito. They never sing pito music when sober. It is sung when they are drunk and in a state of nirvana. Their only instruments are their empty calabashes, tiny stones and their feet. It only takes one elated drunk to start a song by tapping a calabash with a stone. The rest then join in with pounding feet and discordant voices. It is a spectacle to behold!

It is not exactly what one might call a very harmonious music, but it is as thrilling to the audience as it is entertaining to the singers themselves. One may not even understand the lyrics of the songs. But one thing that is guaranteed is that one would be held spell-bound by the performance of the amateur singers.

I attended sixth form in Wa Senior High School in the early 1990s. It was in Wa that I first heard of pito music and also saw pito musicians in action. During my two-year stay in Wa, I had the opportunity to see great Pito musicians. So trust me when I tell you President Ogwanfunu is one of the greatest when it comes to pito music.

For those of us who do not want the eagle-headed Umbrella to return to the seat of government in the foreseeable future, the announcement that the Great Pito Musician is running for President again is great news. It is true that many of his compatriots have short memories. But the few of us with long memories will continue to remind them of the numerous create, loot and share schemes by the unrepentant greedy bastards.

Take the Kumasi Airport renovation, for instance. The renovation cost the country a whopping $29 million. And be reminded that Madam “They-Will-Jail-Me” was the one in charge.

Ethiopia, during the same period, expanded  its airport reach with the construction of three new airport runways in three major regional cites, with a capacity to host big jets like B737 at a total cost of $68.5 million. The first in the southern city of Hawassa cost $22.9 million. The second for another southern city Robe Gobal cost $24.7 million. The third project in the Far North in the city of Shire cost $20.9million.

Clearly, each of the three new airports in Ethiopia cost far less than the renovated Kumasi Airport. Tell me the Kumasi Airport renovation had not been inflated and I would tell you thin-looking General Ntomtom is fatter than chubby-looking Jewel Ackah of blessed memory.

For sure, we cannot dance to President Ogwanfunu's pito music, when we know his return to the presidency will lead this country into the abyss. We cannot dance to his pito music because we do not want to relive the era of inflated projects and the lining of pockets of public officials and their accomplices. We refuse to sing his pito music because we cannot endorse a president who sits on the fence as the country is being milked dry. We are not ready for another SUBAH saga, GYEEDAH debacle, “Akonfem” palaver, phantom tree planting exercise, sad SADA story, messy bus branding and dubious AMERI deal.

As I write, more dubious deals by his administration are being uncovered. But for the vigilance of the likes of Bernard Avle who petitioned our indefatigable Vice-President, the country would have lost a whopping 4.6 billion Cedis in the name of interoperability. Clearly, only those who benefitted under such a corrupt leader would want him to return!

Abusuapanin, despite all his failings, I know many of my compatriots will endorse his candidature if he proves that he is incorruptible. What better way to do that than to respond to the Citizen Vigilante's claim that he had soiled his hands in the dubious Embraer jet purchase.

President Ogwanfunu can continue singing his discordant pito music. But we refuse to sing along because this country is better off without him as President. We know that not even a heavy rain can remove the spots on the leopard's skin.

See you next week for another interesting konkonsa, Deo volente!

From Agya Kwaku Ogboro