The Power Of Listening (Youth Listen To The Elderly)

The Writer

One of the importance of circular education is that it has made knowledge polyvalent in that there are many forms and facets of it. Whereas a school of thought are of the view that a thing is bad, others with empirical evidence will also be of a strong conviction that it is good. The debate on the use of contraceptives is a clear example. One thing we need not forget is that though times changes, wisdom remains constant. The approaches and methods may change or take different forms yet the principles remain constant.

We must appreciate the fact that even before the inception of circular education in Africa and Ghana in particular, societies had their own way of socialization ie passing on believes, customs, precepts, values, norms, among others from the old to new generations.

One of the clichés by then was that ‘the elderly are always right’. This cliché kept ringing in the minds of the youth thus once an elderly person spoke or advised on an issue, the best they could do was to kill their sense of reasoning and just be gullible and dogmatic to the dictates of the elderly irrespective of the cost. I know some folks of today would have a different view especially when what they are being told is not in line with what they wanted to hear or believe in.

However, it is a rare person who wants to hear what he doesn’t want to hear (Dick Cavett). If you make listening and observation your occupation, you will gain much more than you can talk (Robert Baden-Power). Believe you me, life was simpler and lovely then than it is today. Some of our mothers were betrothed to our fathers when they were born yet they accepted those choices as they grew up knowing very well that decisions emanating from the elderly especially their parents was wisdom. Same cannot be said about our generation of today.

The youth are quick to say ‘I know my right’, we are quick to make all sort of logical and theoretical analysis to support anything we intend doing whether good or bad forgetting the old adage that says that ‘ what the elderly sees whiles sitting, the tallest child cannot see whiles at the apex of the tallest tree. Things are even worse as most of us claim to be lovers of God thus read the Bible, Quran and other religious literature. We misinterpret quotations from the bible for instance as a basis to ignore some of the good councils the elderly in society gives us. For instance we are told to abstain from kissing when in a relationship yet one will be quick to quote any of the below quotations:

Rom 16:16 salute one another with an holy kiss. The churches of Christ salute you.

1Co 16:20 All the brethren greet you. Greet ye one another with an holy kiss.

2Co 13:12 Greet one another with an holy kiss.
1Th 5:26 Greet all the brethren with an holy kiss.
As interesting as it look, some will be quick not to talk about the holiness of the kiss and will conclude that the good books endorses kissing thus can be practiced without incurring the wrath of God.

The major difference between the youth of today and the old or elderly is that whereas young men speak with so much idealism, the old speak with so much experience. You will easily hear a young man say after SHS I’ll go to KNUST, study law, then go to the US, study international law do other things, marry a tall, slim, fair and rich lady who can speak very good English and is from Bolga, among others. But when an elderly person hears this, he simply laughs and says ‘young man relax, life is not as easy as we see it’. All the truck pushers, drug addicts, unemployed, etc we see day in and out at a point probably painted more colorful lives they wanted to live in the near future but the question is what went wrong?.

As young as we are we are too idealistic with so much theoretical thinking that we think all that the theories we learn at school says is the ultimate. On the contrary, the elderly after studying all the theories and marrying them with experience have a better and brighter view about life thus we should be quick to listen to them irrespective of our educational laurels.

William Shakespeare said ‘give everyman your ear, but few thy voice. Take each man’s censure, but reserve thy judgement.’ This is one of the difficult things we the youth of today are able to do. Remember God gave us two ears and one mouth so we can hear twice as much as we say. Every person I work with knows something better than me. My job is to listen long enough to find it and use it (Jack Nichols). Proverbs 2:2 So that thou incline thine ear unto wisdom, and apply thine heart to understanding. All the above quotations points out the importance of inclining onces ear to wisdom.

This means we as young people with all the zeal and enthusiasm to do exploits must be quick to listern to the council of especially the elderly even in situations where we disagree with their council. A good listener tries to understand what the other person is saying. In the end he may disagree, he wants to know exactly what it is he is disagreeing with (Kenneth A. Wells). Though we may disagree with some of the ‘old’ and maybe ‘outmoded’ views that may emanate from the elderly in society, let’s give them a second thought and apply some objectivity in our quest to pass judgment.

King Solomon said there is nothing new under the sun. Everything has been said before, but since nobody listens we have to keep going back and beginning all over again (Andre Gide). All that we need as youth to succeed is right with us, if only we can eschew pride and our unwillingness to listen and learn new things we will be making the most out of the stock of knowledge others have.

The youth of today want to be heard but not ready to listen to others especially those who have used the road we are moving on. To listen well is as powerful a means of influence as to talk well, and is as essential to all true conversation (Chinese proverb). The few who listen end up doing their own thing. You cannot truly listen to anyone and do anything else at the same time (M Scott Peck). When you listen to wisdom, endeavor to act accordingly as it is more costly not listen than to listen and act accordingly. Infect you pay nothing for listening to the elderly who are always ready to council and impart knowledge.

A young man went to the hospital to be circumcised, he met with the doctor and accidentally said he wanted to be castrated. The doctor asked him if he was serious and knew what he was talking about? This young man became furious and rained all sorts of insults at the doctor saying he did not know anything about customer relations and threatened to report him to his superiors. The doctor was not given the opportunity to explain to the boy what he was requesting for. He therefore pulled out an agreement form which they both signed then he carried out the operation on the young boy. Guess what! After two weeks, the young boy returned to the doctor to dress his sore when he overheard someone saying she wanted to circumcise her newly born baby. There and then the young man remembered and told the doctor I actually wanted to be circumcised and not castrated as I said.

Fellows, some mistakes are irreversible, let’s therefore endeavor to listen as it is more expensive not to listen. To me average people learn from their experience whiles smart people learn from others; you don’t have to take poison to know it kills. When you talk you repeat what you already know; when you listen you listen you often learn something (Jared Sparks). Let’s therefore as youth be quick to listen and slow to speak.

Avaala Philemon Ndoliyine
Studied BSC Planning at UDS (2012-2016)
Teaching Assistant Faculty of Planning and Management UDS-Wa

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