Alan Cash Is a Profiteering Investor, Not a Diehard NPP Stalwart

I don’t think the Galamsey-polluted Birem River water that got into the “Cranial Cream Puff” of Nana (Kwabena) Akomea has been completely drained yet. Which is why the Akufo-Addo-appointed Managing-Director of the State Transport Company (STC) would be suggesting that had the thrice- or quadruple-resigned “longest-playing” Trade and Industry Minister not renounced his party membership, somehow, Alan John Kwadwo Kyerematen, who is convinced that he ought to have been elected New Patriotic Party (NPP) Presidential Candidate even well before John “The Gentle Giant” Agyekum-Kufuor, would have effectively facilitated the definitive resolution of the seemingly difficult decision of which New Patriotic Party stalwart best deserves to be selected as the 2024 Presidential Running-Mate of Candidate Mahamudu Bawumia.

Now, such a proposition is hairbrained because Alan Cash, the popular sobriquet of Mr. Kyerematen, also imperiously claims to have invested his precious pecuniary resources in the New Patriotic Party more than any other party stalwart. So, whether such corpulent man with an ego the size of the entire landmass of Continental Africa would have so facilely, readily and casually settles for the veritable “Driver’s Mate” that is the 2024 Presidential Running-Mate of Vice-President, is nothing short of virulently contestable (See “Bawumia's running mate issue would've been resolved if Alan is still a member of NPP – Nana Akomea” Modernghana.com 6/6/24).

He may very well have been a remarkably competent Agyekum-Kufuor-appointed Communications Minister, but it also pellucidly clear that the Deputy-Chairperson of the 2024 Mahamudu Bawumia Presidential-Election Campaign is not a well-tutored political strategist, much less an astute political analyst of substance vis-à-vis the real concrete situation on the ground in his own political party, which he joined or into which he had been enlisted or recruited while he was still being diapered by his reportedly overindulgent mother.

The truth of the matter is that Alan Cash was never the sort of collaborative and progressive team player that Nana Akomea clearly wished that he had been, and he would have brought absolutely nothing substantively beneficial to either the twice-elected Vice-President Mahamudu Bawumia or the very political and ideological establishment of the Danquah-Busia-Dombo-inspired New Patriotic Party, of which the Asante ’Dweso and Patasi native has only been a veritable nuisance and a party-pooper for all the three decades that he was the Agyekum-Kufuor-favored Serial and the Dynastic Presidential Candidate of the New Patriotic Party who, by the way, never had any widespread national appeal besides falsely claiming to have rejuvenated the National Democratic Congress-collapsed and the President Kwame Nkrumah-established seminal establishment of the Ghana Industrial Holdings Corporation (GIHOC).

Which is rather funny because in the wake of his very auspicious decision to resign from his boondoggle portfolio in the Akufo-Addo Administration, the very first remark, by way of a characteristically vicious parting shot, that the chronically sweaty burly man made about the very government of which he had been the Trade and Industry Minister for nearly 7 years, was that the Akufo-Addo-led government of the New Patriotic Party had achieved absolutely nothing worthwhile upon which a pathologically mischief-making Candidate Kyerematen could comfortably and “baboonishly” predicate his fourth or fifth presidential-electioneering campaign. One wonders why, if he really thinks and believes that he had done so well as Trade and Industry and Presidential Special Initiatives Minister in the government of his beloved Cousin Nana Kofi Diawuo Agyekum-Kufuor, he would have so stunningly failed to factor such supposedly unprecedented or inimitably phenomenal achievements into the bargain, as it were.

The factual truth of the matter is that a career carpet-bagging and brazen scalawag Kwadwo Kyerematen had not even creditably acquitted himself as the Agyekum-Kufuor-appointed Ghana’s Ambassador to the United States of America, thus his recall back to state-side by his cousin Nana Agyekum-Kufuor. The man clearly lacks any viable and/or enviable diplomatic skills, as scandalously evinced by his very crude and infantile tantrum-throwing flagrant misbehavior. Besides, at 70-plus years old, the last century’s 22-year-old multinational bourgeois comprador supermarket local branch manager is an effectively spent political force who does not have much that is worthwhile to contribute to a nation at the crossroads of its growth and socioeconomic development.

You see, what Ghanaians presently need at the helm of our national affairs are young, visionary, progressive and creative talents to move our beloved Sovereign Democratic Republic into a highly charged digitized Artificial Intelligence-defined and controlled world, and not to be regressively shoved back into the relatively primitive world of locomotive and diesel trains, which the technologically irredeemable superannuated generation of Candidate Kyerematen inescapably and inextricably represents. Indeed, as that age-old Akan maxim felicitously has it: “We fight forwards, not backwards.”

*Visit my blog at: KwameOkoampaAhoofeJr

By Kwame Okoampa-Ahoofe, Jr., PhD
Professor Emeritus, Department of English
SUNY-Nassau Community College
Garden City, New York
June 16, 2024
E-mail: [email protected]