Globally, one in eight women aged 18 to 60 worldwide is unmarried. 4.3 percent of women reach their forties without marrying. By nature, especially in traditionally African societies like Nigeria, women have high expectations for marriage. Psychologically and socially, women reported feeling lonely more frequently than men.
Loneliness comes from a feeling of being isolated and unfulfilled, and often, people who feel lonely get caught up in making a habit of doing things that they would not normally do. They look for love everywhere instead of safely meeting someone they like and falling in love with them. In this case, these women have fallen prey to a man who is a criminal lover.
So, when Ifeanyi Ezennaya, socially known as Emeka, met a group of women in a Lagos bar during a birthday party as part of his tactics, he studied them as likely apprised, economically well-off but emotionally needy, and he knew what to do just by looking at their smiling faces.
He boasted to them that he lived in Oyinbo Land, Switzerland, and some of them immediately got carried away, freely giving him their phone numbers. He waited for a few days, probably chatting with some of them in the interim.
Emeka probably made the women in need of enjoyment smile, laugh, twist, or even sing to "Buga lyrics by Kizz Daniel,'don’t sleep, don't sleep, wake up' while they drink and engage in other behaviors. Emeka’s alcohol, drug, or substance calmingly sedated the six women’s brains, followed by induced sleep.
Ifeanyi Ezennaya, with his introductory attractive name, Emeka, "called that we should hang out in a hotel, and we honored the invitation." "He ushered us to the room he had already booked." "He brought out red wine and some energy drinks from the fridge and served us, and that was all we could remember." Of course, it is called sedatives!
Emeka's alcohol, drug, or substance aided the victimization because alcohol and the administered substance calmingly sedated the brains of the six women, followed by induced sleep.
Why would six women at a time visit one man in a hotel at night, a stranger?
Emeka helps them fall asleep. But that is not what they came for. The drinking and enjoyment reportedly started around 7:00 p.m. With his apparent criminal mindset, Emeka watched the helpless faces and bodies as they became subdued and slept. No one knows for how long Emeka touched and searched the sedated women, but they were incapacitated by deep sleep for six hours.
Upon waking up from having spiked drinks and luckily out of danger of continued sleeping or even death, they noticed that Emeka left with their six iPhones, wristwatches, gold chains, and ATM cards, among others.
At a time of Nigeria’s deep economic misery, unlike violent kidnappers for ransom, Emeka chose a passive path by becoming a con artist who studies and targets lonely and vulnerable women looking for short and fast enjoyment with a man, especially from "overseas," but he ends up emptying them.
There is no doubt that these six women could be financially and emotionally devastated by Emeka’s antisocial actions, especially with the report that he sent the "phones to Onitsha through a waybill and sold them for N900,000," and "withdrew N50,000 from the account of one of them using the ATM card he stole."
Nigerians should not rush to blame the women entirely. They were attending a birthday party in a bar. While chattering away with friends, giggling, some or more of them caught, from the corner of their eyes, a man. They might not have been in a hurry to "pick up" guys, but emotionally to them it will be good for the mind to enjoy the presence of a man in spirit and in flesh. So, they went to see him in his private space in a hotel.
But there is also danger when you visit a stranger in a hotel room. You may get intoxicated, turning a supposed good time into a nightmare. No one can accuse these women of going to the hotel to have sex with Emeka.
Psychologically speaking, one reality is clear in visiting at night, either for just simple fun or for sex, there's no worse sex than drunk sex with somebody for the first time. Going to see Emeka in a group probably seemed like a safety valve, but not when you become a drunken body and brain.
Except for the con artist, Emeka, the women do not fully know what happened to them from 7:00 p.m. to 1:00 a.m. So, out of precaution and to ease their minds, they should visit a competent doctor and get tested for HIV, AIDS, and STD symptoms. As victims of fraudulent love or likeness, these women could find themselves temporally suffering from shame, embarrassment, shock, anger, anxiety, fear, depression, or even suicidal ideation (God forbid), so I suggest they partake in some form of psychological and therapeutic counseling to enhance their coping skills and understand these types of dangers.
Obviously, most people want to be with someone or become married if they wish. Therefore, more safer places to look for non-Emekas are places like schools, workplaces, buses, airplanes, farms, motor parks, worshipping places, supermarkets, but make sure these conduits for meeting are ensued with gradual follow-ups, an open atmosphere, and do not be quick to take that sip of wine, or eat, especially if it is not from you. For the now arrested Emeka, unemployment and economic hardship currently hitting the country could have pushed him into criminality. He acted smartly in the wrong way. He needs to use his brain and hands to go into farming, a more secure and independent job, or other healthy and legal trades.
Prof. Oshodi wrote in via [email protected]