Love & Relationship Advice: My Man Of 5 Years Has Betrayed My Love, Should I Trust Him Again

My name is Nana Ama, I have been in a relationship with my boyfriend for five years.

He recently confessed to me that he has a six month old daughter with another lady. The lady and her mother then came unannounced to his office so he had no option than to take them to his house and they stayed for a week.

I was writing my exams at the time and it was very difficult for me, but I tried my best to go through my exams.

He is now assuring me of his love and his intentions of us getting married.

Even though I still Love him, I feel so betrayed, hurt and do not know what to do.

Please help
Nana Ama.
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Dear Nana,
It would be very easy for me to just tell you to leave this man. However, if it were that simple you would have done so already. Some say better the devil you know although what you need to bear in mind is, should you forgive him, take him back and he repeats this indiscretion how would you cope or trust a man again.

I can only go by what you are telling me and what concerns me most about what you are going through is his blatant disregard for your feelings. Namely choosing to tell you when you have exams. Surely if he waited 6 months to tell you he could have waited a few more weeks so as not to affect your own progress in life.

It maybe you would decide to stand by your man and that is entirely your decision to do so. Although I'm sure you are thinking this is probably not the first time he has cheated and lied. Had it been the case you were married to your partner this decision may have been that much harder. What you certainly have in your case are choices.

The plain fact is there is a baby involved therefore your partner will now always have to maintain contact with the mother. This will surely be an issue every time he goes there to visit his child. You need to honestly ask yourself if you can cope with this or if you want to be in a relationship were you feel insecure.

My advice to you is put your feelings first. This is very important. Ask yourself what you believe you are worth and deserve. How do you see your future with this man and will you be able to trust him because without that it can’t and won’t work.

Hope this helps!
Best of Luck.
Regards,
Ms. A.K  from GC XXX
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