Diaries Of An Oguaa Fisherman: The Dumsor Football In Rome; John Dumelo, Yvonne Nelson; Lydia Forson And Haruna Halidu Exhibit Their Skills

There is no sweet thing like sleeping in between two canoes on a Friday afternoon after a good catch. When you are swept into this realm, dreams of diverse nature cross carpets your dreaming adventures. In situations like this, you do not force to dream like forcing to dream about a lady you have had a crush on. Oh yes! It happens!

And so I fell asleep on one such day not in my bedroom but right on the beach between two canoes after the vicissitudes of life in Ghana knocked me down. Sleeping in such a place does not require any sleeping cloth or blanket (who cares about you anyway) but a pair of shorts and a 2012 party tee-shirt of any political party will do. The breeze of the sea massages you from your eyebrows to the soles of your feet and the experience is akin to using a parachute in an emergency situation.

This unusual dream of football surfaced. Honestly, this is the second time in my entire fisherman life I am dreaming about football. The dream came and left in a twinkling of an eye just as the adventures of ‘Dumsor’ plagues the Ghanaian society. The ‘dumsor’ situation of the dream might have been caused by my turning to stretch and to reposition myself very well to enjoy the dreams carefully unfolding in my subconscious moment. Sooner than later, the dream was set in motion again. In the dream, the two opposing sides staggered from their respective dressing rooms onto the field.The stars I saw in the two teams made my face glow even as I was sleeping. There I saw John Dumelo playing at the centre back position in his team.

He was defending boisterously and ferociously. Alhaji Halidu Haruna, the midfield generalissimo, for John Dumelo’s side was also at his usual best defending his team. On the other side of the football field was Yvonne Nelson, Lydia Forson, Sarkodie, Becca and a certain prampram fisherman; aggressively surging forward to make serious incursions into the goal area of theiropponent.Folks, it was an all attacking game for this team. The nature of their attack forced John Dumelo’s side to defend dangerously and aggressively.

The game was set in motion once again after the first half. The venue came alive as the 26 million capacity stadium sheered their respective sides. For Rome to have hosted this match meant a lot for this game. This Rome has been touted recently as a city that was not built in a day- I guess you and I were not there.

The match progressed. It became a ding dong affair. The social media fans were there in their numbers booing and jeering their opponents. Just when I was about to cross check the score from the score board, a fight ensued at the beach that woke me up. And I realized it was all a dream. Wow! What a dream!

But come to think of it, I think John Dumelo, Alhaji Halidu Haruna, Lydia Forson, Becca, Sarkodieand Yvonne Nelson that took part in the match played in Rome are very significant! Significant in the sense that Ghanaians have been grappling with constant power cuts due to shortfalls in power generation for over two years. People are losing their jobs; amidst the high unemployment rate. The Innumerable unscripted havocs that the dumsor situation is heaping on the nation have made the millions of mouths in the country become weary in complaining about it- who complains to a dead goat anyway.

There are power cuts everywhere; 24 hours of darkness every 36 hours; the whole country is in turmoil and the ‘dependable defender’ who featured in the match in Rome; who knows how and when Rome was built says ‘We should just give him [Mahama] time to solve the problems. The problems are there, but it’s four years; Rome wasn’t built in a day’. Wow! John Dumelo needs a standing ovation and a ride on the back of a whale to Prampram to see the Prampram fisherman.

Is he a businessman? Yes he is! Has he laid off some workers? Yes, he has laid off more than 20 workers and closed two of his businesses- he confesses! Does he anticipate what the workers he laid off are going to do? I guess No! Is he a smart businessman then? Inferring the answer from the speech the president of Ghana gave during the May Day celebration, John Dumelo is not a smart businessman. Why? Because Smart businessmen aren’t laying off workers according to the president of the Republic of Ghana. Seriously, I need no angel to aver that the president did not communicate well on this issue!

Why did we vote for the president? To tell us at the end of his term that ‘four years’ was not enough? Has the President been in government just four years, Mr. Dumelo? Come on! Did we vote for the president and his team to enjoy a jolly free ride, huge allowances and other niceties just to pour unsavoury and savage attacks and comments on Ghanaians whose taxes butter their bread? Why call the fishmonger names just because she asked for premix fuel you have control over for her business?

No wonder, Ghanaian actresses, Yvonne Nelson and Lydia Forson who were the lead strikers in the match played in Rome are unamused and highly disappointed at the state of affairs. They join their team mates; Wanlov the kubolor, Becca, Sarkodie, Chris Attoh et al to express their frustration about this unpalatable state of affairs. For Yvonne Nelson,“It's soo sad, this dumsor crap is here to stay! The president is simply lying to Ghanaians” For Lydia Forson, she likens the president to a kid in school who is always last, always gives the wrong answers and never seems to grasp what is being taught. DKB who was the goal poacher in the Yvonne Nelson’s team that played in Rome wants to lead a demonstration against Dumsor.

No sooner than these comments had landed than one of the ferocious and deadliest defenders in the match in Rome, Haruna Halidu (A former aide to the Chief of staff at the presidency) went to town with scathing attacks on whoever ‘coughs’ Dumsor. “Are those celebrities who are above the age of 30 years and not married responsible? What are they waiting for? Is it the prostitution that they are engaged in which has turned their minds upside down and they don’t sound reasonable again? I have no respect for prostitutes. Let them say whatever they want to say…” Like seriously? If Halidu Haruna had said these in the days of old in a fishing community, he would have gone back home with some 100 strokes of canes.

So a colleague fisherman who was seated next to me when we were mending our net quizzed, “Are all unmarried persons in government and people who are not in government prostitutes? Does marriage have anything to do with intellect and wisdom? Are all people born to be married? How did he know they are prostitutes?

Infact, Halidu (This name reminds me of a title of a story back in the basic school, HALIDU AND THE GOAT) and his likes have touched a lot of nerves. To tell you the truth, the fishmongers here at Oguaa who are 30 years and beyond and are unmarried feel highly insulted. To the fishmongers, if Halidu Haruna had used grammatically correct language to communicate what he said, they wouldn’t have hugely been mad with him.

So, I ask, do my taxes pay these persons too? Since when did it become sinful for people you promised and you continue to promise and whose votes sent you to power to fix their problems become prostitutes. Are they barred from asking people in authority what is happening at the level of leadership, and the kind of leadership prevailing?

It is said elsewhere that the lion never loses sleep over the opinions of a sheep but I tell you the truth, here in Ghana, the lions that abound, now sleep, snore and clear anything in sight when they wake up and are greeted with criticisms. One thing is clear that after a deafening silence there comes uninterrupted expressions of opinions from the masses because when the people are enlightened they will know the truth and speak the truth without fear of any equivocation.

Yes, I agree with you, Mr. Dumelo, that Rome was not built in a day and I don’t think any country was built in a day either,but clichés like this in the hardest of times we find ourselveswill leave the country poorer than we were born to meet it. It is time that leadership that spends the taxpayers’ monies on unreasonable things; pay mouth-gaping and questionable judgment debt; profligately spend our monies,was whipped in line to channel our monies into what can solve the energy crisis. Until this is done, Ghanaians like Lydia Forson, Yvonne Nelson, Sarkodie and the likes cannot be estopped from asking questions.

I do believe that asking questions and criticizing the government is the least of the rights Ghanaians have in demanding accountability from people in government. I sincerely do not think, you will clap for a fisherman like me for just catching fish. I, a fisherman, should do what makes me stand out to receive handshakes and the loudest of applauses.

The writer, Richard Kwadwo Nyarko, is a multimedia journalist. His email: [email protected] . Tweet:@quajo2009. Facebook: Richard Kwadwo Nyarko