Just spare the Rod and spoil the child
10/5/2011 1:43:06 PM -
Parents owe the children a duty to guide them well into life,protect them with foreknowledge acquired over time[expirience]. it is a duty or say task that must be accomplished.If you fail on that duty ,then you have self to blame ,but to examine your duties to extract the reason for failures ,you have to look closely on how to take the challenges of parenthood.
Parenthood is not for a whimp ,not for pauper,not for immature and certainly not for weaklings,it is a full time Job that can make a sane person insane if not well handled and on time.It is not something that can be relegated to one parent ,it is a joint venture that needs attention and monitor of both parents to get the best out of our kids.
Like it or not,being a parent is much more difficult than marriage, but Fun if you apply godly principles and more love with extra caring attitude.It comes with pressure more than marriage ,yet we prefer to divorce in our marriage than to wade into it the same way ,we paddled and swin the impossible water of parenthood.
To get this message right ,please note that i am not talking about some of those men that only contributed sperm to birth a baby ,i am talking about real ones that has the interest of the children at heart.The Fathers that cared and cares for the welfare of the family.
Some Fathers are just a piece of dung ,they careless if the children lived or died ,they want something outside ,they prefer to chase the wind and build castle on the air.Little did they know that later in life ,that it will be too difficult for them to even cry "had i know".
An average African should know that we do not fancy taking life insurance as caucasians do for retirement ,what we have as life insurance is our children and that is why we give them the best to prepare them for the future ,same way our parents gave us thier all as handed down to them by thier own parents and the beats goes on and down the slope.
We do not send our old parents to OLD PEOPLE,S HOME ,unless some of us with mental problem,if your parent is blind,deaf,dumb or worst ,you have to take them under your protection and love them ,care for them and pay them back for giving you thier own youth days.
In western nations ,say Europe and America ,you dare not spank your child or you are in great deal of trouble.Not even to scold a child ,the child will say you raised your voice on him ,which makes parents to quake and stutter before thier own child and they call that living ? ,well it is living in bondage.The day you lost your voice over your child for fears of man made law is the day you lost the right to answer parent.
The Bible tells us in PROVERB 13 VS 24 "24 Whoever spares the rod hates their children, but the one who loves their children is careful to discipline them.",,,,
PROVERB;19 VS 18;18 Discipline your children, for in that there is hope;
PROVERBS 22 VS 15;15 Folly is bound up in the heart of a child,
but the rod of discipline will drive it far away.
PROVERBS 23 VS 13;13 Do not withhold discipline from a child;
if you punish them with the rod, they will not die.
14 Punish them with the rod
and save them from death.
PROVERBS 29 VS 15;15 A rod and a reprimand impart wisdom,
but a child left undisciplined disgraces its mother.
Giving your kids everything they ask for is not the best way to teach them or show them love,there are things they want that will led them into temptation ,no matter how earnest they desired and crave it ,you should not give it to them and if they get it from somewhere else against your advise,just use cain or slippers to flog some wisdom into them and send same article in dispute into trash can.
Flogging a kid has never meant hatered or wickedness ,it means you cared enough for them and want them to turn out the best in life.Flogging is life saver that can never be duplicated.
Some kids always wants to compete with others ,some behave like women ,we know that most ladies always prefer the other woman,s lawn because she think that her,s is more greener ,but she will only know better if she can change her own family with that of the woman she envy and she will find out that ,what she has and complained about is paradise.
Kids wants to have everything in vogue and as parent,it is your duty to examine whatever they want and see if it is good for them or what will led them through the path of perdiction,then you can refuse with your head shaking like mango leaf during harmattan.
There are period kids out grown spanking ,then it is during that period you use your position as parent to bend thier wills ,by taking away all those things that they hold sacred ,those things that makes them think that they are better off and those things that makes them secured enough to twart the parents.
Let us assume that the man made laws as obtained in the west is a preference to many of us ,so we have to work to see how we will walk around those wicked laws ,such laws that takes away our children and put them into a system that will see the same child become a menace to the society.I always believe that it is better to cut our coats according to our cloth,if you have 2 yards of clothing and your coat will take 5 yards,if somebody should then say "cut your coat according to your size ,you see that it is impossible" ,so i prefer cut your coat according to your clothes,if you have 2 yards ,what you will cut is PETTY COAT or say Monkey Jacket ,so that you live within the context of your have and not have not.
The government of the west demand that you do not discipline your children ,then for that the children became stupid,abusive,arrogant and out of control.The parents consented for fears of the law and never at obedience of the Bible.
First ,how do we contribute to the situation ? ,come with me ,,Many of us bought Computer for our kids just to make them happy and we have no control over where they browse,what they do at the internet and when you wants to enquire they may shout that you are invading thier privacy..so what do we do ?..even though you are the one that bought and brought the problem home.Some set up TV in the rooms of the children and they watch programs that you know nothing about ? and you think you are doing them favor ?.
Well you bought it and you take it away ,if the Government does not like it ,they should buy one for the kid.The worst the kid will do is to carry a gloomy face and it will not harm to have a sad face once or months ,than to have a terrible attitude later in life.
Some of us gave them seperate room which has become no go area for the parents,with that they will start a world apart and you dare not enter the room without taking permission from them,what do we do ?
Remove the door to that room ,use that room for something else and let the child know that as long as he/she is living under your own roof ,he has to obey your commandments and before you can conceed him a room ,he has to show that he is under your command and will obey you to the later ,unless he has a good reason to negotiate with you.
If they keep late hours ,then you cut off the pocket money you give to him and if it is too late ,then sleeping outside will be a better lesson.
You gave them money to buy stuff and they refuse to let you know what they bought ? they refused to allow you know how they are progressing ? ,then stop giving them the money ,if they prefer to flaunt Government warning in your face ,then they should go and get the money from the Governmnent.It is not written in your book that you are subject to your son or daughter, they are the ones that are subject to you,not the other way round.They are accountable to you and should fear you ,not dread you but fear, the same fear we all have for our bosses ,because if you fail to fear the boss ,go and sit on his chair or ask him to fetch you lunch,then you will understand what un-empoyment means.
If your child refuse to take your rules serious ,then cut off all the luxury that you bequeated him or her,maybe he is working part time and for that can afford to disrespect you ,then make sure it is not under your roof ..what gave you edge over them is that they live under your roof ,and that puts you in charge.They don,t like it ,they have to make a choice of obedience or getting away from under your roof.After all in Alaigbo ,we say "he who pays the piper ,dictates the tune of the music"
Many will argue that doing so will be invading thier privacy ,waooooooooo ,so it is best to give them freedom to become garbage in future,it is best you make a stitch on time and save further tearing ,than to be sorry later in life ,when there will be no need to even try to chastise the already spoilt brat.
To be a super parent,you must learn how to PRAY with your children,pray with them in the morning,pray with them before they hit the bed.Make it enforceable ,no matter how weak or sad they may be.If you don,t know how to pray ,just take your frustration to God same way you take them to your lawyer ,God is a good listener ,he will never get angry that you talked with him.What matters is for you to open that relationship with him and for him to become part of your household and you will see that he will bring into the family the unity,love,understanding and radiating glory that will make the family EBEANO.
Know it that a family that prays together ,stays together and enjoy the golden love of the Most high God.
Prayer is the E MAIL ADDRESS of GOD and AMEN is the password to his Email ,so after you finish saying your prayers and end with Amen,it will bypass every junk/spam box and go straight into main box.Try it and you will be glad you discovered this hidden in plain sight gold mine.
Let your children also learn how to pray ,if they can learn how to surf facebook,twitter and play internet ,they should also google "HOW TO PRAY TO GOD" .
Do not forget to always have time to eat together with your family ,there is hidden love and caring to eat together,doing all this is setting a standard and your kids shall never depart from it when they grow and they will likely hand same over to thier own kids also.
Take out time to bless them on daily basis,some parents are so good in cursing out the children,,,you will hear some parents call the child EKWENSU [Devil] ,animal,idiot,stupid boy,,,listen the words that proceed out of your mouth as parents has a way to establish in the life of the children ,if you call your own child stupid,idiot,devil ,be on notice that it will hang around his /her neck and they will be acting like the name you call them.
If your child is behaving stupidly ,just continue to tell him that you are blessed,it is painful but progress are recorded by the powers of the tongue.
BE A GOOD PARENT AND NOT A COMPROMISED PARENT THAT WATCH THE CHILDREN GO ASTRAY BECAUSE YOU ARE TOO SCARED TO USE THE ROD OF CORRECTION.