Taking Back Your Happiness

‘Once I get my promotion, I will be happy.’ ‘How can I be happy when I am driving this car?’ ‘I will be happy when my kids are out of school.’ ‘Actually when I retire I will be much more happier.’I guess we have all heard these statements one time or another.

Happiness Is Not About What You Have!
Happiness does not depend on what you have or do not have! I will repeat; your happiness has nothing to do with what you have or what you do not have! Your happiness depends on your attitude towards what you have or you do not have! By sorting out your attitude, you can still be happy even if you are dead broke.

Here is another example of Janet and John, who grew up in the same neighbourhood. They were in the same high school class when in the same year they lost their mothers.

You Attitude Matters
Janet realised that at the age 16 she had to step up and be courageous since her mother had passed on. Seeing her limitation of parental support she made a decision to work extra hard and smartereach time in everything she do. She quickly sought trustworthy mentors and advisers. She went on to excel in life, and now 15 years later she was dubbed ‘a young rising star’ in the middle management she is in. When she was asked the secret of her success she said, ‘I lost my mother when I was a teenager. I had to work harder than other kids. It is the death of my mother that really motivated me to be who I am today.’

On the other side, when John lost his mother at 16, his whole world fell. He lost all hope and meaning of life. This had a negative effect on his behaviour such that his performance in school plummeted. He never finished high school. He turned to drugs to smooth his loss and pain. Now 15 years later we found him in the street addicted to drugs and alcohol, frequently involved in criminal activities. When they asked him how he ended in the street he said, ‘When my mother passed on, it pained me. This is when my life ended. Living without a mother is hard. It is because of the death of my mother that I am here today.’

It is your attitude that matters, for you to be up or down! You have seen happy families who live like church mice; with no idea where the next meal will come from. On the other hand you have seen those who seem to have it all but sinking in a dark cloud of depression.

Better accept it; you will never have ALL that you want. You will always be missing in something.

You Can Be Happy In Any Inspite
One man said, ‘you do not know my wife. That’s why I am miserable.’ Or you can say, ‘My boss is like the devil himself.’ Or you can say, ‘Well, what my parents or child did was a shame. How can I walk in the street?’ Or you can say ‘What good can come out of this suburb?’

Being horrible and miserable will not change your spouse, your boss, your job, your family or your neighbourhood. Even if you marry ‘Miss Universe’ you will not be happy if your attitude is bad. Actually you will ruin her life! It is not your job or boss that needs change. Running from family or home will not do the trick. You cannot change the past, but you can change your attitude; today!

Grow up and face it. A happy marriage is not based on good looks. You see, looks evolve and change with time. Whether your husband has a six pack or is a bitfat, or whether you work in the middle of nowhere or you are in 100^th floor. It is attitude that matters. If having good looks was everything,women married to ‘iron men’ would be the happiest wives. Good attitude is the primary ingredient for your marriage to spark.

Research shows that people mainly blame their spouse, boss/work, their past and the government for their miserable life. Well, your government owes you nothing man! You work for your boss, you are not part of his family! When you married your spouse it is you who promised to make her/him happy! Let these things not affect you.

Success Is A Moving Target!
Success is a moving target! As soon as you hit the target, you find a higher one. The moment you get ‘the car’ or ‘the house’or ‘the job’you will find that there is a better one. Happiness that results from success isshort-lived because the grass is always greener next door. Do not base your happiness on a future targets.

Taking Back Your Happiness
Happiness does not just come. Happiness is a decision. Here are some of the key things you can do to maintain your dose of happiness.

1. Make a decision to seek sustainable happiness. Make your happiness a priority.
2. Make a list of the five top things you are thankful for in life, that is, count your blessings and meditate on them.
3. Make a list of activities that make you happy, and do at least one per day.
4. Accept yourself. List the five best things you are good at, including your gifts and talents; and focus more on them.
5. Keep a positive company. The people who you surround yourself with matter. It is generally better to be alone then be in the mist of negative and depressing words.
6. Maintain positive thoughts. Learn to control your mind and words.

Your Unhappiness Is Letting You Down
I call on you today to take charge and be responsible for your happiness, to make a decision for happiness. After all your unhappiness is compromising your success! Your unhappiness is sucking life out of you! Your unhappiness is letting you down!

It is your choice to be or not to be happy!
Enjoy the rest of this awesome week!
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About Taka Sande:
Taka Sande is an author, an entrepreneur and development activist. He has a passion for making a difference by influencing and adding value to people’s lives. He is the founder of the blog It’s My Footprint, http://www.itsmyfootprint.com /. You can also follow him on Twitter , Facebook and LinkedIn .