Why Men Cheat

By Cosmopolitan
By Cosmopolitan

7/8/2011 10:35:15 PM -


The latest politician to admit an illicit affair? Arnold Schwarzenegger. And along with the rest of the world, we cannot understand what would bring these creepers to step out on their beautiful, awesome wives — especially in cases where the woman is wayyy out of their league (cough, David Arquette, cough). So, we went to the top experts in this field: Real men who have screwed around. Try not to gag while reading these shameless confessions.

"I had been with my girlfriend for so long that anyone who was different from her seemed better and more exciting. I met the girl I cheated with out one night, and I was immediately struck by how different her look and attitude was from my girlfriend's: She had short dark hair, was a few years older than me, and just seemed really independent. I'm not trying to excuse my behavior, but if she hadn't come on to me we probably wouldn't have hooked up. But she did, and we went back to her place and had sex. I felt so guilty afterwards that I ended up admitting what I'd done to my girlfriend, who promptly broke up with me." —Brian, 30

"I surprised myself when I cheated, because I actually felt pretty happy with my then girlfriend. It's only looking back now that I can see what a mismatch we were. She was so sweet, but a total homebody. I am a really social person, and we ended up spending a lot of weekends on the couch because that's what she preferred to do. About nine months into our relationship, I started a new job that had a big happy hour culture. I really hit it off with a co-worker who was more my speed, she was outgoing and vivacious and had tons of friends. We made out a few times, but she wouldn't go any further until I had broken up with my girlfriend. I did, and three years later, I'm still with my co-worker." —Mike, 27

"My ex-girlfriend—who was my first love—broke up with me when we went away to college. But whenever we were home on break we would hook up. When I started dating a new girl my sophomore year, I told myself I wasn't going to fool around with my ex anymore, but I just couldn't resist her. I pretty much lived a double life for the rest of college. At school, I was with my girlfriend, but when I was at home I was with my ex, and neither knew about the other. I never got caught. That was years ago, and I realize now that I was only able to do that because I wasn't mature enough to recognize how hurtful my behavior was." —Wade, 26

"There was a while when I was cheating in almost every relationship I was in. I had an insatiable appetite for the 'wonder' that was hidden beneath each woman I was attracted to. I sincerely believed through cheating and exploration, I would come to find the kind of person I was meant to be with. And feeling like I shouldn't be with someone else because I was in a relationship made that other woman seem much more appealing than she probably was." —Ryan, 24

"I cheated with one of those friend of a friend of a friend—someone I wasn't in a close circle with but saw out occasionally. In hindsight I know I did it out of spite. My girlfriend of a year was working long hours and I felt neglected, and this other girl made me feel like everything I did or said was the most brilliant thing in the world. We hooked up a few times, and I even took her out to dinner! One of my friends knew what was going on, and he kind of did an intervention, telling me that I was screwing up the great thing I had with my girlfriend. So I broke things off with the other girl. That was over two years ago, and I'm still with my girlfriend and am so happy that I listened to my friend." —Taylor, 26

"I loved my girlfriend and couldn't imagine being without her, but at twenty-two years old I also felt like I was too young to settle down. It seemed like I had two choices: Break up with her to have my freedom, but risk losing her forever, or fool around on her behind her back until I had gotten everything out of my system. I figured that would happen by the time I was twenty-four, twenty-five, and then I actually thought I was going to propose and be a faithful fiance/husband. Yeah, I was an asshole and delusional, and I also got what was coming to me. One of her friends tipped her off to my behavior, and my girlfriend broke up with me. I know if I had just broken up with her because I wasn't ready to be serious that now, a few years later, we would have a good chance of getting back together. Instead, she won't have anything to do with me." —Phillip, 25